aristotle was not belgian, the principle of buddhism is not "every man for himself," and the london underground is not a political movement
yes folks, it's time for knucklehead day here at casa jmg and that means you, my faithful followers, are about to be introduced to a few knuckleheads before one of them ultimately gets voted KNUCKLEHEAD OF THE DAY!...
ok, the first knucklehead has to be the president, right? guy signs off on $81 billion package to finance the wars in iraq and afghanistan... now i'm not gonna get all preachy or political here because most of you would stop reading... but if reagan was the great communicator and charlie chaplin was the great dictator then bush is the great jackass...
knucklehead no. 2 is onterrio smith, running back for the minnesota vikings... our boy onterrio, who has already been suspended by the nfl twice for drug policy violations, was recently detained at an airport for carrying an elaborate drug-test-beating contraption also known as "the whizzinator"... i hear onterrio's was pink, but you can get them in all colors, shapes and sizes...
our next knucklehead is macaulay culkin, for no other reason than the fact that a) he is macaulay culkin and b) home alone sucked... still, he'll never reach the level of michael jackson on the knucklehead-o-meter...
the no. 4 knucklehead is former peabody firefighter john brophy, jr.... brophy got shitcanned last week for sleeping through a 911 call to the firehouse regarding a sick child, then also not answering three follow-up calls... naturally, brophy is appealing this decision by peabody's mayor, saying the punishment does not fit the crime... buddy, you're a frickin fireman - your job is to respond to 911 calls, a.k.a. EMERGENCIES, not sleep through them!... and yes captain, i was reading the peabody weekly news online, thank you very much...
our final nominee tonight is james toney, who whomped chelsea's own johnny ruiz at madison square garden for the wba heavyweight title a couple weekend's ago, but tested positive for steroids shortly thereafter and will subsequently be stripped of his crown as well as suspended 90 days and fined 10 g's... this one kills me... with things the way they are regarding steroids in sports right now, how could this guy, or anyone who has anything to do with him, be stupid enough to do/allow something like this? did they think he wouldn't get tested? it's like admitting you're guilty ahead of time... what a bunch of fuckin morons! harharharharharhar...
ok, that's all the time we have on tonight's edition of knucklehead day... the voting for KNUCKLEHEAD OF THE DAY begins right now... i choose the boxer and the president in a hotly contested tie... lates.
ok, the first knucklehead has to be the president, right? guy signs off on $81 billion package to finance the wars in iraq and afghanistan... now i'm not gonna get all preachy or political here because most of you would stop reading... but if reagan was the great communicator and charlie chaplin was the great dictator then bush is the great jackass...
knucklehead no. 2 is onterrio smith, running back for the minnesota vikings... our boy onterrio, who has already been suspended by the nfl twice for drug policy violations, was recently detained at an airport for carrying an elaborate drug-test-beating contraption also known as "the whizzinator"... i hear onterrio's was pink, but you can get them in all colors, shapes and sizes...
our next knucklehead is macaulay culkin, for no other reason than the fact that a) he is macaulay culkin and b) home alone sucked... still, he'll never reach the level of michael jackson on the knucklehead-o-meter...
the no. 4 knucklehead is former peabody firefighter john brophy, jr.... brophy got shitcanned last week for sleeping through a 911 call to the firehouse regarding a sick child, then also not answering three follow-up calls... naturally, brophy is appealing this decision by peabody's mayor, saying the punishment does not fit the crime... buddy, you're a frickin fireman - your job is to respond to 911 calls, a.k.a. EMERGENCIES, not sleep through them!... and yes captain, i was reading the peabody weekly news online, thank you very much...
our final nominee tonight is james toney, who whomped chelsea's own johnny ruiz at madison square garden for the wba heavyweight title a couple weekend's ago, but tested positive for steroids shortly thereafter and will subsequently be stripped of his crown as well as suspended 90 days and fined 10 g's... this one kills me... with things the way they are regarding steroids in sports right now, how could this guy, or anyone who has anything to do with him, be stupid enough to do/allow something like this? did they think he wouldn't get tested? it's like admitting you're guilty ahead of time... what a bunch of fuckin morons! harharharharharhar...
ok, that's all the time we have on tonight's edition of knucklehead day... the voting for KNUCKLEHEAD OF THE DAY begins right now... i choose the boxer and the president in a hotly contested tie... lates.
posted by jmg at 11:21 PM
3 Comments:
yeah jmg i pick the firefighter, although the president was a close second. oh yeah and a follow up on dave chappelle. i heard breaking news on my favorite morning news show, the daily buzz, that dave chappelle disappeared, but actually went to south africa and signed himself into a mental institute. although i see this as a good way to find some new sketches since he was so pressured into making his skits even funnier than his original stuff, what better place to go than a mental institute and in south africa cuz they probably wont see it on tv anyways. hes a genius.
I vote for-
Toney. Smith's 'kit' probably is not illegal. If so, the airport SCREWED him bigtime. Bush doesn't get my vote, because that is knucklehead by committee. Brophy was a close second, but that was more lazy douchebag as opposed to knucklehead. Culkin is just a waste. His life must be awful. boy did he turn out to be FUUUUGLY.
So it goes to the 'prize' fighter. The neat thing here is that if he is stripped of the title, there is a vacancy for heavyweight champ. (Ruiz retired). That makes for a great opportunity for boxing to once again bastardize their sport. Will Tyson get a crack at the title?....
Stay tuned....
-The Sheriff
I go with Macaulay Culkin mainly because he and I have worked together. He a prima donna type no doubt. MJ likes him because he sucks. thebigman
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